Please be honest:do i still deserve a guy who never cheats on me,who loves me and gives me all happiness?

oh darling, everything you have said just further proves what an incredible and deserving young woman you are. not that it even matters, you are a virgin. virginity is only defined by a males gentiles in a females. even if you were not a virgin, that does not take away any of your worth. you are a whole person and deserve so much in life. past experiences should not dictate your future in a negative way unless you let it. you were young and completely taken advantage of and it is disgraceful. i cant stress enough how much this was not your fault. you were completely innocent in this act. you are not a slut by any means. do not ever think such a thing. you are clean and lovely. there are many girls who willingly participate in ual acts who are not slutty and are complete people who deserve the world. its terrible that this was forced upon you without having any say in it. he is a truly despicable man and should never have done this to you. i understand how much it weighs on your conscience and how much it affects the way you see yourself. you must know that you deserve love, happiness, a family and a great man who will love you forever. i know for you this was traumatic, and has lowered your self esteem, but you have to put yourself out there. by your standards, I'm sure you feel ashamed and terrible, but if anyone else heard your story, the only thing they would think is what a horrible guy he was. no one will even focus on what you did with him. the act itself is not a big deal at all..its the way that is happened that is appalling. i would actually recommend that you see a therapist that you can open up to, and hopefully one day share this with the man that you care about. love should be pure and there should be complete trust, and i have no doubt that he would embrace you with open arms and apologize for what happened to you. sometimes when we keep something inside for so long, it tears us apart and holds us back from enjoying life. letting it out can be the first step to starting a new life..a life without guilt and fear and embarrment. you will thrive in this world and in a relationship, especially once you find a way to overcome this. sometimes the best way is by telling someone you trust and talking through it with them when you are ready. honesty is a beautiful thing. the most important thing to know is that this was in no way your fault, and you have nothing to be ashamed of. you will have a great life ahead of you if you can realize and accept how much you deserve goodness, laughter and love. please feel free to write me anytime. i know you can do this. i know you can overcome it. your life is too special to let it be overshadowed by something that happened when you were 15. i know it hurts, but take control of it instead of letting it control you. my most heartfelt best wishes.